Pills

Seems I swallow a lot of them lately. Both, in the literal and figurative sense.

For the most part they do me good but some are tougher to swallow than others. Like for example, the pill I've been avoiding which is to change my married name back to my maiden name. I wanted this from day one, when I filed the divorce paperwork. Just made sense to restore my birth name, as if it's wiping away a memory. It's just the angry cloud that looms over my head. Heck, I still have bills and credit cards gimmicks that come to me in my maiden name and I haven't used that last name in nearly 5 years.

Maybe it's a sign. A sign that I should just swallow the damn pill already and just let it all go. I'm finding a lot of things these days are tough to do. Every time I turn around, there's a new pill to swallow and something else to "let go" of. I do sit back at times and wonder. Wonder what the future has in store for me and when, just when does swallowing pills get any easier? Unfortunately, I don't have that answer and probably won't for some time, but had I known my medicine cabinet would turn into the world of wonder, I think I may have been better off leaving it shut. Some pills you just can't avoid. And sadly, most dark clouds that taunt, don't just go away on their own.